Strange title isn't it but by the time you've jerked your way through this story I hope you'll understand how it was conceived. I originally intended to call it 'Summer Storm' as my new next door neighbour kicked up such a storm when he dropped in unexpectedly on me last summer. He was a lawyer by profession but turned out to be such a proficient lap dancer during his first visit that 'Lap Dancer' became a very strong contender. Then as things unfolded between us we became kind of inseparable so 'Lymph and Latex' it is.

I live in a place called Atlantic Loop which mainly consists of compact condos for newly- weds or business men. Seems a lot of marriages are going bust nowadays and there's a big demand for single units. So some of my male neighbours are married and others are footloose and fancy-free. Colin turned up on my doorstep during a freak September storm. The kind you get when the elements go wild. It seems his car had run into a tree on his way home and for some reason he'd mislaid his latchkey so by the time he'd hiked his way home he was drenched to the skin and seeking shelter. At least that was his story. Personally I was of the opinion it was just a lame excuse to get into my pants. Still who was I to complain. I'd had the hots for him ever since I saw him mowing his lawn just after he'd hit the neighbourhood and that had been over four months ago.

The horny hum of the lawn mower must have penetrated my dreams as I'd woken up with a harder than usual hard-on and the sight of him sweating away in shorts and singlet had turned rock to steel. Everything was clinging to him including my eyes and I had to jack off behind the drapes as I watched him slaving over a hot lawnmower. His wife had a habit of clinging to him too. Not that I could blame her. So until that stormy day we'd never really had the chance to get beyond the odd cursory nod. Although several times I could swear I caught more than a hint of neighbourly interest in his big brown eyes. Now it seemed that wifelet was away visiting her sick mother and the sexual coast was clear. As he stood dripping on my deck, transparently telling me his tale of woe, I must say I found his story difficult to swallow but before long I was having similar difficulties with his dripping dick and by then was past caring.

At first I was the perfect neighbour. I told him to get out of his wet things and take a shower. I gave him my best cotton bathrobe and made him hot chocolate. So far so good. Then, as he lay back on my davenport thanking me for my hospitality, the robe which was two sizes too small for him, slipped open to reveal one perfect pec above and one comely crotch below. He sipped his hot chocolate gratefully and made no attempt to cover his bare essentials. He told me he'd been wanting to meet me for quite some time. Said it was easier for women as they usually baked a cake as a calling card. All he had to offer was a game of golf. His golf balls were staring me in the face as he spoke and his golf club was beginning to take shape just above them. I had no need of a caddy. I was down on him before he could say another word. But to my dismay he wasn't ready to play ball.

"I'm not gay," was his feeble protest. However the juicy giant between his legs seemed to be of quite another opinion. I opened wide and said 'ahhh' appreciatively as it came up to meet my mouth. His dick was definitely straight but he most definitely not.

"You don't need an alibi," I assured him. "I won't tell your wife. Just lie back and enjoy."

I dribbled liberally all over his magnificent munchy manmeat and made it slip and slither between my moist lips. He didn't need much more persuasion. In fact his contented lovepole developed a little moisture of its own and seeped pre-cum into my mouth to add to the home-made lubricant we were producing between us.

"This wasn't what I came for," he said pushing me further down on him.

"What did you come for?" I asked sliding back his foreskin and giving him a gentle jerk off in the process. His legs parted like the Red Sea and I submerged myself in the seething quicksands that lay between his thighs. He rose like a tidal wave to engulf me and the robe slipped off his shoulders to reveal his rocklike pecs. I surfed his ab track and sucked on his nipples. He let out a mammoth moan of absolute pleasure and I soon had him writhing to my command. I repeated my question. "What did you come for?"

"This," he finally admitted with a lurch of his hips. He closed his eyes and lay back on the sofa. "Suck me some more you horny bastard. Suck me senseless"

I tantalised his mushroom head with the tip of my tongue and then sucked him off slowly. His ass rose involuntarily from the sofa and I took advantage of the moment to grab his butt cheeks. I massaged, moulded and manipulated them while he was busy making a road map out of my mouth and careering from side to side in happy delirium. I was reminded of that magic moment in 'Ghost' when Patrick Swayze and Demi Moore are making love at the potter's wheel. All that was missing was the music from 'Unchained Melody.' I was just about to take five and ask him if he'd seen the movie when the thought struck me that I was nineteen and he probably no more than ten at the time.

"That feels so good, Daddy" he crooned as his dick kept coming back for more. My head swooned with the size of him. "So fucking good. Never imagined another guy could make me feel this good."

I remembered reading somewhere that in order to be a good lawyer you had to be a good liar but decided to give him the benefit of the doubt. Although I wasn't too happy about his use of the word 'Daddy' especially as I was so sensitive about the difference in our ages. So, just to remind him I wasn't his father, I released his dick and let my tongue slide down under his scrotum to flirt with the fluttering flaps of his butt slot. It had the desired effect. I graduated from 'Daddy' to 'man'.

"Man, what are you doing to me?" he groaned. "That feels good too. So good."

For a lawyer he was sadly lacking in vocabulary.

I decided to get down to brass tacks and spat unromantically into his ass. I slurped and slobbered as a prelude to using my tongue as a fuck-feather. If this truly was his first time with another man I wanted to make it memorable. I wanted his neat little lovehole red-hot and ready to take everything I had in store for it. I wanted to paint his ass with cumshine and let him see all the colours of the sexual rainbow. Seems I was on the right track too.

"Wow," he said, sitting down on my tongue, "You sure know how to make a fellow feel hot."

Turned on, in spite of myself, by his inane love talk, I wanted to make him feel even hotter. Maybe even use some new vocabulary. I shoved my tongue straight up his heaving love chute.

There was a sudden step change in our relationship. He hit the ceiling and nearly took me with him. His body vibrated like an erupting volcano. Wanton moans and groans came out of his throat like full throttled lava. "Fuck me." he cried. Although it was more of an exclamation than a request.

"All in good time." I said almost cruelly. I was determined to drive him absolutely wild but wanted to be the one calling the shots. I went down on him again. That was my undoing. He took over the sexual reins from then on. I'd miscalculated somewhat and hadn't bargained for the strength and the girth of his dick. It really packed a wallop. Nor was I prepared for the fact that he seemed to undergo a personality change and began bumping and grinding like Miss Mazeppa giving vent to her trumpet. He literally had me foaming at the mouth and gasping for breath. My jowls expanded to such an extent I thought my jaws would burst. Or vice versa.

My head felt like a whirling wind-machine. I had visions of the Greek god Zephyrus morphed with Gabriel blowing his horn. In fact mythical is the only word to describe it. 'Giving head' suddenly took on new connotations for me. Especially as he seemed intent on tearing my hair out by its very roots. At the same time he spurred me on with the dirtiest language I'd ever heard. Outside of a porno film, that is. I tell you man, if my mouth hadn't been so full of his drooling dick I'd have told him to go wash his out with soap. And the further his dick got down my throat the fouler his language became. In fact, it got tackier and tackier. It really turned me on. He was spitting tacks and I was spitting cum by the time it was all over. As my mouth and I collapsed under the savage onslaught he came in huge quantities and was as happy as a puppy who'd been given a prize bone. Which is something of a contradiction as I was the one who got the boner. And a mouthful of red-hot cum cream.

"That was great man." he said. "Then, I suppose you know I had the house key all the time."

"Yes," I said, breathlessly gulping down his cum.

"I guessed as much but I wasn't about to turn a bona fide visitor away from my door."

"Do you know what that means in legal language?" he asked.

"Tell me," I said, wiping the rest of his cum off my chin.

"It means honest and sincere intention. Without deception."

I smiled. "Well I think your intentions were honest and sincere enough." I said, licking the last drops from his dick. "Your dick certainly didn't lie. I knew it wanted me as soon as you sat on my sofa. Still does apparently," I added, as I grabbed hold of its already stiffening neck.

He shivered. I wasn't sure whether it was with cold or desire. I decided to light the fire. We lay like babes in the wood listening to the fire crackling and the storm bursting over our heads. I needed time to gather my strength, and myself, together. His dick on the other hand was already hard and raring to go. I couldn't quite believe that he was here in my arms and that we'd had sex. It had all been so unexpected and over too soon. Like a fast food meal. And we'd only had the first course. Still, my bruised and battered mouth told me it was going to be quite some while before I was ready for seconds.

It was dark by now and the fire flickered on the shadowed sculpture of his fabulous form. It had me wishing I had a camera to capture the beauty of it. I felt my dick stir. He was too good to be true. His chest was like a marble slab. I wanted to eat off it. Instead I ran my hands over his entire body as if I was committing it to memory. He shivered again. This time I knew it was with desire.

"Nobody ever touched me like you do." he said sighing contentedly.

"Nobody he or nobody she?" I asked, caressing his money purse of a ball sack. He didn't answer.

"I've been watching and wanting you for months," he said. "Wondering what it would be like in your arms."

"Or in my mouth." I said.

"You took the initiative there."

"Touche'," I said playfully. The conversation was getting far too serious.

"Touch me again," he whispered huskily. He obviously didn't speak French.

"Sara never touched me like that. Never blew me like that either."

"What do you two do?" I couldn't help asking. I pulled him towards me so my fingers could further investigate his butt.

"Not a lot," he admitted. "My dick was a bit too much for her."

"Was?" I said.

"We haven't made love in weeks." So that's why he was so hungry.

"It was a bit of a mouthful for me too," I joked, moving my jaw gingerly. "But I managed." My fingers were stealing their way into him as I spoke. He moaned as I knew he would. "Have you done this before?" I asked almost as if I were inviting someone to their first dance.

"No," was his bona fide answer. He lifted his head and kissed me.

I wanted to respond but my mouth was still bruised from its previous occupant.

"Sorry," he said and slid down my body to kiss my dick instead.

"Ever blown a guy before?" I ventured.

"No," he said again.

"No time like the present."

He hesitated a little too long for my liking. I took the initiative once more and placed his head in position. He touched the tip of my dick tentatively with the tip of his tongue. It was like getting a child to stick his toes in a swimming pool for the first time. He was such a mass of contradictions. He had a body and a dick like iron but there was something almost boyishly feminine about him. He licked my dick like a novice who wasn't sure she wanted to take her vows. And only half an hour ago he'd been spitting obscenities at me and ramming his hot man-flesh into my mouth. Hard to believe this was the same person.

"If you don't suck me off I'm going to have to beat you and put you to bed." I said at last.

"Yes please," he said.

So that's how Colin's cookie crumbles, I thought to myself.

I climbed on top of him. I wasn't really schooled in the skills of sado-macho mastery but I was willing to have a go. If he was serious that is. I didn't have a bedpost so I tied his hands behind him just like in "Tie Me Up, Tie Me Down." Movies can be very educational you know.

"Lick my balls." I ordered. He did so obediently. And well. So well in fact that my dick rose to its full height. Things were literally looking up.

"Open your mouth." I ordered again. This time he didn't obey. I slapped his face with my dick. Still he didn't open up. "Open your mouth and take your medicine." No response. I slapped him with it again. On the right cheek, then on the left. Still the obstinate little bastard wouldn't open up so I took it out on his face. I hit him until we were both red, white and blue. In fact he got me so mad and excited that I came all over him. Eyes, mouth and throat. Not necessarily in that order. "Now look what you've gone and done." I said angrily. "How can I fuck you now!"

"It doesn't matter," he said, licking his lips and my dick happily.

I'll say this for him. He didn't leave a single drop of cum.

We were both pooped out by now and fell asleep in front of the dying fire. We woke up shivering and I finally got to fuck him under a hot shower. He took to it like a fish to water and couldn't get enough of it. In fact his ass just didn't want to let my dick go. Although, of course, he eventually let it cum. I fixed us both something to eat and fucked him again after dinner. Twice. On the kitchen floor and later in my bed. In fact I surprised myself with my sudden Viagra-like virility.

The storm was still raging outside. We cuddled up together for warmth, in the spoon position, and during the night I felt his dick working his way into me. His revenge was sweet. He fucked me good and hard and lost all his boyish femininity. As usual he swore like a fucking fishwife and took my butt to market. I began to wonder whether it was his thick dick or his foul tongue that his wife had objected to most. Actually in the short time we were together I developed a taste for both. I knew he had several sexual hang-ups and spouting obscenities was just his way of asserting his manhood.

His spouse was due home later that day but we had one last long lingering fuck before he left.

By now I'd fucked him in every position I knew but the one he liked best was doggy-style. He was something of a liability as he loved hanging precariously onto the bedhead or the stairway rail as I rammed him to kingdom come. When we fucked in the kitchen he almost tore the door off the fridge. This time he grabbed the back of the sofa and bent his butt like a cat in heat so I could get even further up his hot little ass. Somehow or other I ended up on the sofa and he landed on my lap. It was sheer fucking heaven. He worked his way up and down my dick like a horny pole dancer and I rode him like a deranged rocking horse on an out-of-control carousel.

Our tongues interlocked and we tongue fucked and butt fucked simultaneously. It was wild.

He came all over me and I drank it all in like a thirsty child and fed him the residue from my fingers. Lust turned to love as we imbibed our combined cum in a fertility ritual. It was as if we were drawing life-giving strength from the milky sap of a rubber tree or the lymph from each other's glands. Lymph met latex and bound us together firmer than blood brothers.

He went home to Sara but was back that same night. I'm happy to say that yet another marriage hit the skids and yet another gorgeous male came out of the closet.

I know because he's still hanging his hat in mine.