I haven't talked much about Tommy and me through much of this time period. The truth is, we were just comfortably happy. We knew. I don't know how we knew, but we did. When I looked at Tommy, I was looking at a part of myself. I imagined him in all sorts of ways. I saw him as an old guy with a pot belly and a saggy ass. I saw him aging as a distinguished gentleman who kept good care of himself. He was gray at the temples and had a small moustache. I saw him in a wheel chair, stricken by some horrible debilitating disease, with me pushing him anywhere he needed to go. The point is that I saw him with me...always. Nothing else mattered to me. I loved him.

It was easy to love him now. He was so sexy. When he thought I was still asleep, I would watch him come back from his shower, still damp, with drops of water dripping from his hair down on to his wide shoulders. His chest was so beautiful. His dark nipples were hard as they shied away from the cool air evaporating from their darkened surfaces. The definition of his pecs was just enough to make me want to reach out and trace their manly outlines with my fingers. A soft line of hair disappeared beautifully beneath the white towel wrapped loosely around his waist, promising wonderful things beneath.

He would remove the towel, nonchalantly, not knowing the wonderful things its removal would do to the voyeur on the bed. His penis was long and dark and beautiful, nestled perfectly in the moist, warm safety of the embracing ball sack. When he dried himself there, I wanted to reach out for him...touch him, but the dream-like mood would have been broken. Then he would turn and bend to dry his feet. The sight that greeted me was beyond compare. What an ass the man had! What a beautiful, beautiful ass! In the morning, when the light caught it just right...what a beautiful, beautiful ass!

But it was the eyes that drew me in. Through the eyes of Tommy Anders I was drawn into the most beautiful soul I had ever known. Sometimes I would make him just look at me. I wouldn't let him talk, or look away, or even blink if he could help it. I just needed him to look. I needed to enter through his eyes into his soul and to stay there awhile and feel warm and safe, and to wrap myself in his love. And I was loved. I never doubted that...ever. I couldn't imagine how terrible it might be to love someone as much as I loved Tommy and not know that I was loved in return...just as much...maybe more, for Tommy showed me in countless ways how much he loved me. He told me he loved me, sure, but that was never necessary. I heard it over and over in the way he looked at me...in the way he treated me. He lived his love for me, and I, in turn, tried my best to live mine for him. We shared one soul. We would share it always.

But you fucked everything running within a three-state area. Well, yes. Better put, they fucked me. I'm a bottom, remember? I can't explain it, exactly, but that never was a problem for us. We loved the sex we shared together. God, I loved to be in Tommy's arms. Tommy's embrace was home for me. And I loved to hold him, too. I loved to feel his head nestled against my chest, and I liked to play with his hair, and bend down and kiss his forehead and blow in his ears and try to make his dick get hard without ever touching it. Our fit was perfect. Not all of you will understand, but some of you will. Sex with Tommy was sacred. It was fun and felt good and was tender and was rough and was all of those things. But the bottom line was that it was sacred. It was an expression of sacred love, and no matter how much wild fun we were having doing it, we were expressing a deep, committed, and lasting love.

The other stuff was just fun: recreational sex, I'll-show-you-mine-if-you-show-me-yours sex, you-have-a-nice-ass-can-I-fuck-it? sex. I liked to call it "Hokey Pokey Sex": "You put your dickey in. You take your dickey out. You put your dickey in and shake it all about." It was pure wanton fun. God, I loved that kind of sex. You saw a cute guy and he saw you and you winked or just gave him a "my place or yours?" look, and away you went and a half hour and a couple of moans and groans later, you were ready to do it all over again. My raging slut side was insatiable! Tommy understood that. He knew you couldn't rope a wild stallion (Am I conceited or what?). He didn't want to. He liked his little escapades as well. He was more subtle, perhaps, but no more innocent. There were some hot times in store for anyone who winked his way. We enjoyed it. We wanted it for each other. We loved to share the stories that came back from some of those episodes. Sometimes they turned us on...sometimes they cracked us up. We trusted each other completely. Some people don't get that. And, of course, it really is no one else's business. Why should loving someone mean that you put your body in shackles for the rest of your life? (Well, once in awhile was okay.) It worked for us, and so we did it.

Of course, that doesn't mean that all of the sex I had was without emotion. There were times when the sex was somewhere between the love I shared with Tommy and an anonymous romp in the hay. I truly cared for some of the guys with whom I bedded down. Timmy was so cute and so fun. I felt like he was a sort of little brother. He was another bottom so we had to take turns on top, but that was kind of fun too. It was kind of a sexual leap frog. I can't say I didn't like fucking. It felt good enough. I just liked being fucked better. And Randy was nice. He was a little quieter. I always felt with Randy like I was in the presence of a very noble and powerful spirit. There was an aura about Randy. I loved to be with him. It was like having sex with some sort of Greek god. Benny and I never had sex after the orgy at Simon's, but that was certainly a week to remember. We would always remember it and had become good friends. We didn't ever mention it, but there was a bond there. There was a you-are-one-sexy-son-of-a-bitch bond, and I never ceased to enjoy watching his ass disappear into the sunset. And what about Herbie? There was only the one time with Herbie, but I so wanted him to feel loved. He was such a good person, and so cute, really. If he could have only seen himself as we all saw him. If I could ever have been accused of being noble, that was my noble night. I hope it did some good. And who says doing good is its own reward? Herbie was one fantastic....!

Okay, there was Andy. I knew you were going to bring that up. Yeah, I loved him. I really did. Not the way I love Tommy, but there was a sweet vulnerability to Andy that made it impossible not to love him. He was a total innocent. Loving Andy was like loving an angel of some kind. He changed me in many ways...all of them for the better. I knew him for how long, two weeks? But through him, I connected with parts of myself that I never knew existed. It's as if he were a messenger of some kind sent to teach me some sort of life's lesson. I know that sounds really stupid, but that's how it felt. Even while I was loving Andy, somewhere deep inside I knew that Tommy and I would be together for ever. It was early in our relationship, but I knew. I will never ever quite understand Andy, but I will always be grateful for having known him. Part of me will also always wonder if Andy was real. And what about Little Andy? He was real all right. I would run into him again when he was a grown man. But, that's another story.

My point is, I think, that we were us. We made our own rules and we lived our lives by them, and as long as they worked for us, who the fuck's business was it what we did...except that we had to hide much of what we did. We tried to get past that, but nothing can console you when you're unable to live your lives openly and honestly. And, yes, we could have chosen to "come out" and just be who we were and "to hell with the world", and we did eventually...but not then. We couldn't really. I don't think we were cowards, at least we didn't think we were at the time. We weren't noble enough to be martyrs. I think we preferred to think of it as accepting the reality of a world that we didn't make, but were forced to live in. The straight world didn't understand us and, didn't care to. Although we seldom expressed that out loud to one another, it was understood and it burned quietly and bitterly within.

I remember a time when I had to meet our philosophy of love head-on. I was laying on my bed studying one night, when the door opened. In walked Tommy with one of the most gorgeous blonde boys I think I have ever seen. He was absolutely beautiful. I said hello, and Tommy introduced me to Tony who he said was from Italy. I laughed and asked if Tony was from the part of Italy that was really close to Sweden. Tommy said, "No, dumass, there is a part of Italy in which most of the people are very blonde." I'm still not sure I believe that. Tony had this really sexy accent and this even sexier body, and as I watched, Tommy just took him in his arms and kissed him...long and hard. I can't say I wasn't shocked, but non-jealousy was our agreement. I thought, however, that this blew the holy fuck off the top of discreet and that he could have at least done the little shit from the blonde part of Italy somewhere in which I wasn't reading my goddamn history book!

Then he starts to undress little Tony right there beside his desk. Now, I did get into that a bit. I was proud of my ass, I mean really proud. But this ass was perfection. Holy shit. This ass should have been inducted into the Perfect Ass Hall of Fame. It was perky and light and hairless and muscular and jiggled just enough to make it interesting when he moved it. I was instantly hard, and I was so engrossed, that I almost forgot to be pissed at Tommy for uncovering it right there in our dorm room in front of me. The dick was not bad either. Maybe it was an Italian thing, but it kind of flowed out and up and draped over his balls, kind of like water spewing from a Roman fountain. Tommy could call him Tony if he wanted to, but from that moment on, the kid was "La bella Antonio" to me. I had no knowledge of Italian, but in my mind it meant "Unfuckingly beautiful blonde boy from Italy." If he had been my date, I would have taken pictures of him in every one the different kinds of poses you see Roman and Greek gods in and made a scrap book out of them later. This was a body to be remembered. But Tommy was going to treat him like an ordinary mortal and just fuck him silly and send him on his way. Oh, Tommy, what a waste!

And then, Tommy started to undress. That was it for me. I had forgotten how pissed I was. I mean I was really pissed! I didn't care if he had recreational sex, and I was glad that he had found the "Mona Luigi" to have it with, but we had to have an addendum to the rules: No sex in the dorm room with beautiful blonde Italians when the other guy is in his goddamn bed reading his fucking history book! Otherwise, I was going to have to hurt someone. I couldn't believe it. By the time I had figured out just how pissed I was going to be, Tommy was naked and leading the Swedish Italian boy towards his bunk! That was it. I was outta there. Then they stopped. Tony turned his back to me, which wasn't all bad, and a match was struck. Oh great, they were gonna do it by candle light in addition to everything else. When he turned around, he was holding a cupcake with a candle in it, and they both started to sing "Happy Birthday". It was my fucking birthday and I had forgotten all about it. Tony was my birthday present!!!!

Well, actually, he wasn't a present exactly. Well, he was, but not in the way you're thinking. Tommy hadn't paid him or anything like that. Tommy had met him the week before at a party and thought that he was so beautiful inside and out that he wanted me to meet him. He had told Tony about me and Tony had wanted to meet me too. Tommy had told him that my birthday was this week-end, and they had cooked up this little birthday surprise. This would be my first birthday three-way. Rub-a-dub-dub and all of that. The way they had started the whole thing out was kind of a dirty little trick, but with Tommy and "La bella Antonio" standing naked in front of me, who was I to hold a grudge? I cried. (Oh, shut up. I do not cry all the time.) My tears were a combination of being pissed and being relieved and loving Tommy and knowing that Tommy loved me and seeing the most gorgeous blonde boy in the whole wide world walking towards me naked, holding a cupcake with a burning candle on top. This was almost as good as the tricycle I got when I turned five. I was seated on the bed, and Antonio just walked slowly over to me, holding the cupcake and said in his sexy Italian voice, "Blow." And did I ever blow! Only it wasn't the candle I blew. Shit, he could blow that out himself. I grabbed that beautiful Italian sausage and started to give it the sucking of its life. After all this was my birthday present and I could eat it any time I wanted to. Tony dropped the cupcake, put his hands behind his head and began to moan. I was surprised that he did not moan in Italian. I guessed that music wasn't the only universal language. I understood exactly what Tony was saying, and took a little more of that wonderful dick into my mouth. Naked Tommy was standing behind him rubbing his dick around on that unbelievable ass, only judging by the sounds he was making, he was believing in it pretty good right now.

Tony tasted good. There's nothing more to say about that. He tasted damn good, and I was enjoying the tasting, so I wasn't too thrilled when he pulled his dick out of my mouth and lifted me to my feet. I almost lost teeth. I didn't have much time to think about it, however, because suddenly there was this wonderful, beautiful tongue in my mouth exploring and sucking and in general, driving me crazy in there. At the same time, there was a hand rubbing my dick through my jeans, and then unzipping my zipper. Another pair of hands began unbuttoning my shirt, as the first pair continued to work with my pants. As my shirt was pulled off my back, my pants fell gently to the floor. I was still busy enjoying the tongue, however, and couldn't be bothered with details.

Suddenly there were lips on the head of my penis. They were familiar lips, so I knew exactly what they were about to do. They were about to drive me crazy, that's what they were about to do. They would play a bit with the head of my dick and then they would SLIDE SUDDENLY CLEAR DOWN TO THE BOTTOM OF MY DICK WHILE A FINGER RAN RIGHT STRAIGHT UP MY ASS! Needless to say, I lost the very nice tongue in my mouth when I had to open my mouth to scream. Holy shit, that boy could make me scream every single time, even when I knew it was coming. I always told myself that I wouldn't react like that because it always made him laugh hysterically, but damnit, I always did. Of course, my having a wonderful Italian tongue swirling around in my mouth had given the asshole an unfair advantage. Poor Tony didn't know what was happening, and only my grabbing his hand as he turned kept him from running out the door into the hall stark naked.

Well, that did it for beautiful, wonderful, soft and passionate love making. Once you've had a finger shot up your ass, gentle is out of the question. I was ready for some hot, hot boy sex with two of the nicest dicks west of the Mississippi. Three ways were unusual for Tommy and me. Well, let's just say that three ways with both of us present were unusual for Tommy and me, so I wanted to make sure we did all of those fun three way things together, since who knew when we might get another chance? Sucking a dick together was always one of my favorites. I got down on my knees with Tommy and we started sucking Antonio together. His dick was big enough to allow us to both have a little section of our own. Tommy got the upper end with the nice Italian head, and I got the lower end with the unbelievable Italian balls, mmmmmm, and then we joined together, French kissing across his massive appendage. The multi-national flavor of two Americans French kissing each other around an Italian dick did not go unnoticed in my evil mind, but I decided not to mention it, seeing as how my mouth was at the moment much too involved in other things. Lordy, did we suck that dick! We sucked so hard that we completely forgot about poor Tony, until he said, "Guys, you've got to stop now. I mean right now. You've got to stop!" And he pushed both of our heads hard enough that we both fell back onto the floor. It worked. We stopped. Tony was about to cum, and when we wouldn't stop, he didn't know what else to do.

"Okay, Willie, it's your birthday, where do we go from here?" I would rim Tony while Tommy sucked his magnificent dick. That's where we would go from here. So, after some very nice three way kissing and fondling to set the mood, Tommy and I went to work on opposite sides of Tony's anatomy. Did I mention what a nice ass Tony had? I simply dove in and forgot about everything else but the wonderful ass I was rimming. There was nothing in the world but the wondrousness of that ass. I licked and kissed and sucked and rubbed and then I would come up for air so I could dive right down in there again. On the other side I could hear Tommy groaning and slurping away. Once in awhile he would reach around to touch me on the shoulders or to caress me around the ears. Tony just moved and twisted a little here and there and squeaked a high little squeak when something hit him just right. That was kind of cute, so it became a sort of challenge for us to do things that would make him squeak. Then it was time for the Williewich. The climax (every pun intended) of the evening would be a fuck by the enormous Tony while I sucked the amazing Tommy, followed closely by a fuck by Tommy during which I would suck Tony. If I was as good as I thought I was, it would all end in an orgasm unknown in the history of mankind. It would be a 9.9 on the orgasmic scale, or, if not, at least everyone would get off nicely. This could only be done if I was crossways on the bed with the fucker behind me and the suckee in front of me. I was only too happy to assume the position. Tommy had to wait, however, while Tony penetrated my excited and anxiously awaiting ass. I loved the feeling of a new dick. No two dicks felt exactly the same, and I knew Tony's was going to be a treat to be treasured. First, he gently rubbed the lube around my ass, making sure to get me ready by caressing and teasing and lovingly licking me before gently inserting a finger inside to stretch me just a bit before penetration. Then slowly and carefully he pushed in that massive head, being very careful not to hurt me as he did so. Of course, I was in heaven as he slowly entered, filling me with all of the sensations I so dearly loved. Both of us moaned in approval of our beautiful ass dance, and, when he had entered all the way, we both stopped so that we could savor the incredible feelings. "Mmmmmmmmmmmmm."

Then I reached out and pulled my Tommy in closer, taking his hard penis into my mouth. As I did so, I closed my ass down on Tony's dick, signaling for him to start fucking. He did, and I started sucking Tommy's dick. What a birthday present this was. I was in heaven. Tony's dick was just right for ass filling, and Tommy's was, as usual, a perfect fit in my happy mouth. This was such a comfortable and wonderful thing we were doing that we went on for quite sometime, enjoying all the feelings of the wonderful three-way sex. It was absolutely perfect. But even perfect can't go on forever, and so, in time we moved on to the wonderful world of three-way orgasm.

Tommy and Tony changed positions (Oh, it was with sadness that I let that wonderful dick be taken slowly from my ass.), and now I would suck on that member that had given me so much pleasure, as my love, my Tommy, did all of those wonderful things that only he knew how to do to bring me off with the perfect orgasm. There would be no tenderness now. We were all ready to cum, and cum we would. Tommy entered me quickly with one sharp thrust. I liked it that way sometimes. I liked the way it felt as the dick plunged in up to the hilt. And I started to suck vehemently on Tony's huge cock, at the same time massaging his tight little ass. Faster and faster my Tommy fucked me, as closer and closer I came to the perfect end to a wonderful birthday. I tried to get my finger inside Tony's ass and he spread his legs apart so that I could more easily push it in. Harder and harder Tommy fucked, and harder and harder I sucked on Tony's dick with my finger fucking in and out and in and out of that beautiful ass. As we were nearing our mutual orgasm, Tommy reached around and started beating my dick furiously. But it was Tony who would signal our triple cum. I felt his dick tense in my mouth getting ready to shoot as his ass clamped down on my finger, causing my ass to clamp down on Tommy's dick. I sucked as hard as I could on the dick in my mouth and Tommy squeezed harder as he continued to jack the ready dick in his hand. And then with one final beautiful thrust: Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! The room was filled with our sounds as we shot load after load in each other, on each other, and on the bed and floor beneath.

And then there was silence. Tony's cum was dripping out of the sides of my mouth, my finger still buried in his ass, as Tommy's dick was softening inside me. No one wanted it to be over. Not one of us moved as the warm glow spread throughout our bodies. Finally, when we had to, we all slowly moved at once, laying down on the bed together and kissing one another tenderly. We were exhausted...in a good way.

"Happy birthday, Willie."

"Thank-you, Tommy, you wonderful and sexy yet devious and tricky asshole."

"Happy birthday, Willie."

"Thank-you, Tony, you blonde, Italian, big-dicked new love of my life."

That would not be the last fuck of the evening, but it would be the best. Tony spent the night with us, but had to leave early the next morning. We adopted him as part of our group, and he would remain a close friend throughout college. Tommy and I had a quiet Sunday together, reading, and being sweetly aware of why it was that we would spend the rest of our lives together.