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Holier Than Thou by Barringer

This started out as one of those second hand stories that people unload on you when you’re sharing a six pack of beer or a couple of bottles of wine. But somewhere along the line there was a kind of thought transference and the whole thing suddenly became upfront and personal. Even so I want to share it with you. Please try not to be too judgemental or “holier than thou.”

I was lulled into lust by someone who gave me his trust. My friend Michael who was going through a mid-life crisis. More than that he was furtively peeking through an ever-widening crack in his sexual closet. He was born in the early sixties when girls wore mini-skirts and “real men didn’t eat quiche.” Consequently, he had auto-convinced himself that should a man occasionally stray from the heterosexual marital bed and indulge in a little homosexual quiche it was absolutely essential he should remain stoically the crusty outside layer and never allow himself to become the soft squishy stuff inside.

He’d had a few tentative flings with men but they were all fuck’n’forget affairs. He certainly didn’t make them sound very sexually satisfying. A devout Catholic, he consoled himself by thinking he hadn’t really sinned because it had just been a matter of “whip it in, whip it out and wipe it” as he so unattractively put it. I suppose one of the main problems was that he came from a deeply religious family and had one of those ancient hang ups about getting pleasure from sex. Still he’d been married for nearly twenty-five years and had two teenage children. In fact, I felt sorry for his poor wife and, after his confession, was sorely tempted to call his kids “whippets” every time I saw them. I couldn’t help it.

He was obviously suffering as he spoke and needed to get something off his chest. He said he wanted to confide in me. But could he trust me and all that shit. I was pretty intrigued and couldn’t imagine what could be so terrible that he couldn’t seek help from a priest.

“Come on man,” I said, “Why don’t you just cough it up?”

An unfortunate phrase because, besides sounding more like a stereotypical doctor than a substitute spiritual father, I was reminded of the last time I’d swallowed somebody’s mouth-watering cumjuice.

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He took a long swig from his beer can and looked at me as if he was about to break down any minute.

“I’ve met someone,” he said finally.

I breathed a sigh of relief. “Is that all!” I exclaimed, wishing to comfort him. Instead it had the opposite effect and he burst into tears.

“He’s one of my students and he’s only eighteen,” he blurted out, “Just two years older than my son.”

As if that was a bigger problem than wanting to whip it in and whip it out of his student.

“His name’s Austin Wood and he’s wonderful. He has a dick to die for and he’s dying to stick it in me. And I’m dying for him to do it.”

And at that he sobbed pathetically into his beer.

I tried to look at him compassionately but all the time I was thinking to myself, “Well that really was a mouthful wasn’t it?”

I had to stifle a smile as I thought of Michael with Austin’s huge teenage dick in his mouth. If not yet in his ass. I knew he was telling me all this because he wanted me to give him my sexual blessing but even I had to admit he was heading for deep trouble. Up fuck creek without a paddle in fact. Except he probably had a very big “paddle” by the look of the size of his hands.

“How come you saw his dick?” is all I could say. (You know now never to come to me for advice.)

“I just couldn’t avoid it,” was his reply. “He kept flashing it at me at every opportunity.”

I was tempted to say that he shouldn’t have given Austin the opportunity but I’m glad I didn’t. I hate sounding judgemental and “holier than thou.” Instead I said, “Tell me the whole story from start to finish.”

And here it is. Almost.

“Well I’d had my eye on him for quite some time,” said Michael. “He’s so intelligent and has such a sweet face. And a great sense of humour.” he added.

This surprised me, as Michael has no sense of humour whatsoever. In fact he’s deadly serious. Which is one of his problems. I suppose it was probably a question of opposites that attract. Austin sounded like a real ray of sexual sunshine. I was getting horny for him already. And I got even hornier as the story unfolded. It seems he had a great body too as well as a big dick. What a waste, I thought, wanting to give all that to mournful Michael.

“We developed a great student teacher relationship,” my friend went on, “but I was convinced that’s all it was. I mean I couldn’t believe he could be interested in a man of my age. But I’m told some boys like older men.”

“And how!” I said.

“Anyway the first time I felt stirrings in my loins was when I saw him out jogging in the park one Saturday. He’s usually so soberly dressed. The regular college boy in fact. But here he was in a tee shirt and very tight cut offs. He looked so virile.”

Only Michael could say “virile” instead of “sexy”, and whereas any normal guy would have had a hard-on, he had “stirrings in his loins.” Still I couldn’t help liking him. We’ve known each other forever and he’s been a good friend to me. It’s just that he’s so straight-laced and boring. Thank God somebody like Austin had come along to lighten him up.

“He was so graceful too and this feeling swept over me that I couldn’t suppress. I wanted to pick him up in my arms, carry him behind a tree, and make love to him. There in front of everyone. I didn’t care. My dick was like a tree trunk itself. You see his cut-offs were full of holes. It seems it’s the fashion. And you could see parts of his flesh. His butt and everything. And it was obvious that he wasn’t wearing underwear.”

“The slut!” I said to myself.

“So what did you do?” I asked him.

“Nothing. I admired him from afar and then tried to cast the sinful thoughts I’d had about him from my mind. You see I was convinced that I was possessed and obsessed and that the devil was tempting me.”

“I’m sure he was,” I said, “but sometimes it’s kind of nice to give into temptation. Relieves the stress. I mean don’t you ever jerk off?”

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“Pope Benedict says we are not to waste our seed. He was very clear on the subject.”

“That’s probably because he’s not gay or doesn’t get stirrings in his loins.”

“Don’t be glib Barringer.” Michael said curtly.

“Sorry. Please go on.” I said.

“He was behind on some of his grades and I offered to give him a bit of private tuition.”

“I bet you did,” I thought, wondering when the cat and the whippets were going to be away so that the mouse, or rather rat could play.

“It gets pretty hot and sticky in the summer and my wife takes the kids to Mount Hood.”

“Never mind about Mount Hood,” I thought. “Just tell me about mounting Austin Wood.”

“The first time he came round my wife was still there. I was rather relieved in a way. I knew I wouldn’t be able to keep my hands off him. We made another appointment for the next day. After Alison and the kids took off.

“As he was leaving I complimented him on his ‘hot pants’ and said I’d seen him out jogging in the park. That was my undoing. He was wearing them next time he came. They were more off him than on him and he was more out of them than in them. As we sat studying together I put my hand on his thigh and his dick rose up to meet it. I could see the head of it peeping out of one of the holes. It made me so excited.”

“And it’s making me horny as hell.” I said to myself, imagining the scene.

“I said. You’d better put that away before you catch cold.”

“You didn’t!” I said in disbelief.

“I’m afraid I did. I was so embarrassed.”

Michael looked at me as if he didn’t quite know how to put his feelings into words. Especially feelings he was convinced he shouldn’t be having.

He put my hand on it --- ‘to keep it warm,’ he said -- and I worked my fingers in under the holes to touch it and eventually to kiss it. I’d never had a male member in my mouth before but Austin was a good teacher. It felt strange at first being taught by my own student. Giving me ‘extra tuition’ so to speak. I’m afraid I was very much in need of it. I’m very backward in such matters. And I’ve always feared hell and damnation.

His penis was huge but my desire was strong. I knew if I had to go to hell I was going to make sure I went there with Austin’s tool in my mouth. It tasted so good and made me feel sensations I never dreamed possible. He made me go all mushy inside and I decided, then and there, that was where I wanted him to be. Inside me I mean. I was overwhelmed by a sudden need to feel that hardness in the soft center of my being. To be possessed by him so to speak. Not that I felt he was the devil. Not at all. I felt that he’d been sent to deliver me from the torture I’d inflicted on myself all these years. Living in hell on earth when I could have been in heaven with some beautiful angel like Austin.

And it wasn’t too late. He may have been thirty years younger than me in age but he made up for it in experience. I was a baby beside him. In fact he undressed me like a baby. I haven’t been undressed like that since my scoutmaster tried to have his way with me when I was thirteen. He almost did too until I frightened myself with my lustful feelings and tore myself out of his muscular arms and went sobbing down the hill towards a lake. Unfortunately many people witnessed the scene and imagined the worse and he lost his stripes. Or whatever they do to disbarred scoutmasters. I felt so guilty. It was all my fault.

Now here I was making the same mistake again as Austin opened my pants to liberate me, and probably take me to a sexual paradise, I was once more engulfed in shame and tore myself away from him. Of course he couldn’t understand what had come over me and I didn’t have the words to explain. Now we’re at the parting of the ways.

By now, I was at the parting of the ways too. Michael’s stirring story had made me so hot and horny. I wanted Austin Wood’s dick in me too. I wanted to be taken to a sexual paradise and feel unholy sensations I never dreamed possible. I too was possessed. I wanted him more than I had ever wanted anyone. And I didn’t care if I went to hell for stealing him from Michael. As long as I went there with his dick in my mouth. Or better still in my ass.

Bet you expected that didn’t you? Bet you’d like to get in his holey pants too wouldn’t you! Come on admit it. Don’t try to be “holier than thou.” It’s not the first time loyalty’s gone out the window for the sake of a piece of ass. Or in this case dick.

Anyway I gave Michael what advice I could. The usual platitudes. The answer is inside you and all that. No pun intended. But I was also honest with him. I told him how his story had given me the hots for Austin and almost asked his permission to step in and take over if he ever felt he wasn’t up to it, so to speak.

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I’m happy to say he did finally get to feel Austin’s dick up his ass but the exhilaration didn’t last long. He was soon back into castigation which seemed to give him more of a kick than penetration. I did my best to help him but it was a losing battle. He’d seen the light for a while but the devil soon had him back in the heart of darkness. Although Michael was absolutely convinced he was serving God. There are none so blind as will not see.

I lost touch with him for a while. Then I learned he was training to be a priest. The best thing for him I thought. He was halfway there already. And as he said himself, admittedly in a different context, “It was never too late to find heaven.” It wasn’t too late for me either. I went jogging in the park and, lo and behold, who should I run into but this twink in hot pants.

I supposed I qualified as an older man although I was light years younger than Michael. Still all Austin seemed to be looking for was a father figure and I fitted the bill there ok. We hit it off immediately, as I always knew we would. And soon I was working my fingers into his horny little holes and kissing his awesome dick. One thing inevitably led to another, as things do, but I must say I didn’t get to feel any of those censorious, sententious sensations Michael had talked about. They’re for the birds (and probably Michael) and are just as pompous and ‘holier than thou’ as they sound.

Of course I never mentioned my friend’s name to Austin. Most of the time my mouth was too full of his dick anyway. And at other times I was so busy moaning and groaning at the feel of his penal fullness that words and conversation would have seemed superfluous. His gorgeous meaty dick was all I had ever desired in a partner and as Michael said he also had the sweetest of faces and a great sense of humour. What more could a guy want!

Unless he happened to be “holier than thou” that is.

The Badpuppy.com model in these pictures is Trent Austin

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